1. What’s his/her name or alias?

“Evil Beerman”. A dude who likes beer, but is evil… hence, the name is self-explanitory.

2. What are his/her abilities?

Super strength from all the carbs in the beer, also extremely light (even though he doesn’t look like it) due to all the carbonation he ingests which means he can jump high and float on water, and he also has a destructive power in the form of a giant burp. Seriously, he can level buildings.

3. What’s his/her main goal as an all-powerful villain?

To be the primary supplier of beer to the entire planet, and corner the market on snacks usually consumed with beer (corn chips, beer nuts, pretzels, etc).

4. By what means does he/she go about trying to accomplish this?

Burping away the competition or drinking them out of business, and rebuilding or aquiring the breweries as part of his evil empire. The same applies for the snack industry. Anyone in his way is burped into oblivion. Not a pretty way to go.

5. What’s his/her fatal flaw or weakness?

Bullets, along with liver and heart disease.

BONUS: Describe or draw your preferred villainous attire.

I’d see if Molly wanted it, otherwise I’d throw it out or drop it in a food bin. I hate peanut butter.

2. If you were to be cremated, where would you want your ashes to go and why?

Somewhere up in Algonquin. I’ve always loved it up there. Camping is a passion of mine, and I take every opportunity I can to escape the city and technology. Can’t wait to go on a bunch of trips this year, and if everything works out, a solo one too!

3. If you could invent a flavour of jelly beans, what would it be?

I don’t think there is a jelly bean flavour that HASN’T been tried. Look at Jelly Belly jelly beans. They’ve got a TON of flavours… even “popcorn”, which is just wrong. Also, for a while, there were “Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans” based off the jelly beans in the Harry Potter books. Earwax? Ugh.

4. What would your perfect paradise be like?

Up north/north-east about three or so hours from Toronto, with a large plot of land next to a lake, a large cottage which I would call my home, perhaps some neighbours not too far away but far enough away that I would have some privacy and they wouldn’t complain about loud music, and a high speed internet connection so I could stay in touch with the world and update my site as infrequently as I choose.

5. If you could fly, where would you go?

Anywhere I wanted at that given time. Australia? Sure. Bahamas? Why not? Australia? …again?

I have many happy memories, ranging from times with friends, times with family, and times doing my own thing. I can’t think of a specific happy memory that stands out among the others… I’m just glad to have as many happy memories as I do, and the chance to make more.

2. What is the most important life lesson you’ve learned?

Enjoy your time with your family and friends, because when they’re gone, you’ll always wish you had done one more thing with them.

3. What is the most difficult decision you’ve had to make?

It wasn’t a difficult decision, but it certainly was the one I never wanted to face: When my Father collapsed the first time and was rushed to the hospital, the surgeon told me that they needed to operate to try and save his life. There was a chance that he might die on the operating table, yet if he didn’t have the surgery, he would most certainly die. It was a no-brainer; go forward with the surgery… but to have that decision fall on me was stressful to say the least.

4. What is the best thing about your life?

Molly. In the last year I would have lost my mind without her help and constant support. Thanks babe. I love you.

5. What is the biggest challenge you’re facing right now?

Just making sure that everything gets done that needs to get done. Many things on the go right now, but in six months, the chaos that is my life should have settled down, and I can get back to enjoying it as much as I used to.

In Ontario, the youngest age someone can get their license is 16, and that’s fine by me. We have graduated licensing, which means that they have restrictions for the first few years before they get a full license. That’s a good thing as it cuts down on some of the recklessness that kids of that age have, especially on the road. However, for someone like me who never got around to getting their license, the restrictions are a bit of a pain in the ass, especially considering I’m 31, and quite a responsible person these days.

No, really, I am! I swear!  

2. At what age do you think it’s appropriate for someone to first drink alcohol?

When they’re old enough to know what a hangover is, and suffer through it without bitching.

3. At what age do you think it’s appropriate for someone to become sexually active?

If it’s my kid, when they’re old enough to know that if they end up having a child before they’re ready (as in, have finished school and have an established career) that I’ll kill them. 

4. At what age do you think it’s appropriate for someone to vote in elections affecting national and/or local government?

When they’re old enough to have a personal opinion about what they’re voting on, and truly understand what having a vote means.

5. At what age do you think it’s appropriate for someone to be conscripted for military service?

Never. It should be an individual choice, and not something that someone is forced into. That being said, however, I’m going to encourage my kid(s) to serve in the military for a bit when they are in their teens. It’s good to have some discipline in your life at that age if you don’t already have some.

Knowing my friends, they’d probably choose something embarrassing or weird, like a donkey or a slug or a fainting goat.

2. If you could choose an animal that would best represent you, what would you choose?

A cat. I’m inquisitive, cute, love to play, have quick reflexes, and I’m always eager to have my back scratched. Also, I purr sometimes, but only for one person.

3. If you could have an actor play you in a movie, who would it be?

Ryan Reynolds. He’s frikkin’ hilarious, and can be a complete sarcastic smart-ass. Just like me.

4. If you could meet someone who is dead, who would it be and why?

Galileo. To thank him for being the visionary he was, and for his contributions to the future of mankind, even though his theories were met with opposition from some of the backwards people of his time. Without him, science wouldn’t be where it is today.

5. What would your last meal be?

Chicken and creamed corn soup. I love that stuff… to death!

…so, you know, I would eat so much of it that I would die, thus making it my last meal… ah, forget it.

Considering that I work for a DNS provider, that I run my own blog, and I generally surf the ‘net before heading to work, it’s safe to say that I spent about 10 hours a day on the internet. Excessive? Perhaps, but I love the days that I can get away from technology.

2. What are your favorite 3 websites?

- BBC News
- Slashdot
- YouTube

3. Do you eat at your computer?

More often than not. I eat my lunch and snacks at my desk at work, and sometimes eat my meals at home at my desk and surf via my Macbook. Once in a while I’ll eat in front of the TV, but usually only if Molly and I are watching something together.

4. Pick one and why – Reading the news online or in a newspaper?

Reading the news online. It’s faster, current, you get to see some comments by other people (if the news site allows it), and I don’t have to worry about getting rid of a stack of paper when I’m done.

5. How many people are on your instant messenger buddy list?

27, but I usually only talk to about 12 of you with any frequency. You know who you are.  

Lose the gut. Easy answer.

2. Would you rather lose 10lbs or 10 points off your IQ?

I’d rather lose 10lbs. Anyone who would choose to lose 10 points off their IQ instead of losing 10lbs deserves a shot to the head (which would result in losing more than just 10 IQ points).

3. When you look in the mirror, are you happy with what you see?

Most days. I’m sure everyone has one of those mornings when they don’t think they look all that great; bad hair day, bags under their eyes, etc. But, more often than not, I see one sexy devil in the mirror. Yes, I am that vain.  

4. Have you ever dyed your hair?

Many times, and many different colours.

5. How often do you weigh yourself?

Usually every morning. There are graphs on my site that prove this. I haven’t really been eating that well lately, or even working out, so the numbers are higher than I’d like, and I haven’t had the urge to post them. That will hopefully change soon. Life has been insane lately.

At the office.

2. What time is it?

1:56pm.

3. What are you wearing?

Clothes over top of an Evan suit.

4. Any people or animals around you? Describe them.

Co-workers are around me. They are an interesting lot, yet I do not know how to describe them. I have a stuffed Yoda on my desk. Does that count as an animal?

5. What are your plans for the weekend?

Dunno. Molly is going away for the weekend, so I am left all by my lonesome. This calls for some crazy antics!! 

1. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?

A train engineer. I had a fascination with trains when I was younger, and wanted to be the one who would drive it from point A to point B. At the time, my brother had the idea of being the best chef, so we made a deal that I would drive passenger trains, and he would be the head chef cooking the meals that we would all eat.

Ahhh, the imaginations we had when we were younger. Didn’t quite turn out as we planned.  

2. What is your current favourite song?

“Gives You Hell” by the All-American Rejects. I don’t know why I like it so much, but for the last few months, it’s been one I’ve played quite a bit.

3. What was your best latest purchase?

Hah. That’s easy. The cleaning of the family engagement ring that I proposed to Molly with.

I bet you thought I was going to claim it was some piece of technology…!?   

4. What is something you always wanted to do and have never done?

Walk on the moon. Sadly, I don’t think it will ever happen.

5. If you were to be a movie character from a Sci Fi film, what character would you be?

Malcolm Reynolds from the short-lived TV series “Firefly” and the subsequent film “Serenity“. His sense of humour and sarcasm, lack of respect for authority, yet solid moral code, makes him a very cool character.

Play with the cats, check my email and perhaps read some of the news, check the weather, get into my clothes, sort out my backpack to take to work, check that all windows are cat-proof (I don’t like to leave windows open wide enough for the cats to slash the screen and possibly fall out when I’m not there), and head out. If it’s not a work day, then I’ll just play with the cats, and later on figure out if there is anything in the house to eat (other than the cats).

2. What is your nightly routine?

Usually watch some TV shows or a movie for the evening before going to sleep, or perhaps play a video game or surf the ‘net. Not really into having a routine for the evening; generally just continue to do whatever it is that I’m doing until I’m tired enough to go to bed.

3. Do you like to listen to the radio when you sleep or have it quiet?

I like to have it quiet. Ambient noises, such as the fan whirring, my computer humming, or background city noises, I can deal with. But music playing or a news report being broadcast? I find that I’ll subconsciously listen to whatever is playing and never drop off to sleep.

4. What do you like to sleep in?

Light shorts and a t-shirt when it is warm, and light pants and a t-shirt when it is cool. Sometimes if it is cold enough, I’ll also sleep in my green housecoat (which ROCKS, by the way).

5. What is the first thing you think about when you wake up in the morning?

“Mmmnn-mmn-uh…? …wha…? *grumble grumble* Khmmmph. (rubs eyes) Time to get up already? Frak.”